I recently read “Traveling with Pomegranates: A Mother Daughter Story” by Sue Monk Kidd and Ann Kidd Taylor. This book is “a wise and engrossing book about feminine thresholds, spiritual growth, and the relationship between mothers and daughters” and I loved it!

The sections by the mom, Sue explore many facets of aging and deepening spirituality, while Ann’s chapters are lighter, exuberant and achingly truthful.

Being the mom of three daughters and personally going through many of the mid-life questioning and questing that Sue is doing, I am savoring this book as one would savor a big, round ripe pomegranate! I am finding a deepening and an enriching of my spirituality emerging with the reading. It also gives me distinct pleasure to be reading this book in an area of the western world that has welcomed Eastern spirituality and religious freedoms. Vancouver, with it’s partner city San Francisco, spawned the hippie movement, which provided a gateway for the emerging Eastern spirituality and the furthering of a differentiation between religion and spirituality

First, here are some definitions from Wikipedia (www.wikipedia.org ):

“Religion: A religion is a set of tenets and practices, often centered upon specific supernatural and moral claims about reality, the cosmos, and human nature, and often codified as prayer, ritual, or religious law. Religion also encompasses ancestral or cultural traditions, writings, history, and mythology, as well as personal faith and religious experience. The term “religion” refers to both the personal practices related to communal faith and to group rituals and communication stemming from shared conviction.”

“Spiritual: Spirituality, in a narrow sense, concerns itself with matters of the spirit, a concept closely tied to religious belief and faith, a transcendent reality, or one or more deities. Spiritual matters are thus those matters regarding humankind’s ultimate nature and purpose, not only as material biological organisms, but as beings with a unique relationship to that which is perceived to be beyond both time and the material world. Spirituality also implies the mind-body dichotomy, which indicates a separation between the body and soul.

As such, the spiritual is traditionally contrasted with the material, the temporal and the worldly. A perceived sense of connection forms a central defining characteristic of spirituality — connection to a metaphysical reality greater than oneself, which may include an emotional experience of religious awe and reverence, or such states as satori or nirvana. Equally importantly, spirituality relates to matters of sanity and of psychological health. Spirituality is the personal, subjective dimension of religion, particularly that which pertains to liberation or salvation.”

So, while spirituality may be connected to religion for some, it can also be the subjective sense of “a power greater than oneself, a sense of expansiveness, connection and awe” that is experienced outside the realm of organized religion. It is this sense of expansiveness and connection that guides hippy grandma to keep the hippy love flowing for generations so our children and our grandchildren and on and on, may also catch some star dust!

“The true harvest of my life is intangible – a little star dust caught, a portion of the rainbow I have clutched” – Henry David Thoreau

Enjoy your day.

peace, namaste & hippy love for generations,

Zoey – founding hippy & ceo (chief enthusiasm officer) at hippy grandma & life & biz coach for women

Are you a heart centered and soul filled shopper? Through your purchases, you help local artisans, hand-crafting grandmas on a pension, women’s fair trade co-ops and programs designed to support vulnerable mamas & babies. Please share Hippy Grandma widely and wildly with your soul brothers & sisters.
www.hippygrandma.com

Love Your Self: Self Care is Not Self Improvement!

I hope you enjoy this article, have a wonderful February, the month of ‘love’ and share your hippy love with your friends and family!

peace, namaste & hippy love for generations,

Zoey – founding hippy & ceo (chief enthusiasm officer) at hippy grandma & life & biz coach for women

Do you ever find yourself wondering exactly what does “unconditionally loving one’s self” or “self care” mean? In my coaching practice, I have many women ask me, “but isn’t it selfish to put myself first”? In the following coaching conversation I often use the phrases “motherly love” and “compassion towards yourself” as capturing the essence of self-care! Another word that fits into this discussion is “maitri.” Maitri is a Sanskrit word often translated as “unconditional friendship with oneself”.

What strikes me is that as we can develop “unconditional friendship with ourselves”, we bring compassion and gentleness into our “self-care” practice. Starting from the perspective of gentleness and respect allows life to flow forth in quite a different way than striving towards the completion of projects.

Self care is not self-improvement!

In coaching, my clients and I also talk about self-care and how the tendency is for many women to start making lists of how to improve. The lists often include: eat better, exercise more, start meditating, spend less, get organized, do more yoga, pray more, lose weight, spend more time with elderly parents and on it goes.

Self-improvement as a generalization, starts from the place of being “not good enough”, and “there’s room for improvement” and certainly, there is a time and place for self-improvement (like, say, when you have just had a heart attack and there are a whack of new lifestyle changes to make). Yet, self – improvement is different than self-care.

Self-care is about starting from the place of “I am enough, I am good enough, I have enough, there is enough, I know enough, I do enough.” Self-care is about affirming “my life is unfolding perfectly, in the right order, with the right events, in the right timing.” Self-care is soft and gentle and respectful of your basic goodness.

Now, of course there are times in our lives when self improvement is necessary and important. The key part is in recognizing in oneself if there is a pattern of “not feeling good enough” and continually playing that out in one’s life. Practicing daily “self-care” can help to shift that pattern and deepen a sense of self-acceptance, peace and fulfillment.

So, from that soft and gentle place for the month of February, here are some exercises for deepening your “self love” with “self-care”.

1. Read the descriptions of self-improvement and self care again, then stop, go inside yourself and see if you feel the difference in these two important concepts. Use the following questions to help:
• if you had to give the two concepts each a colour, what colours would you chose?
• when you say the phrases self-care and self-improvement where in your body to you feel each phrase?
• what does your heart say about each phrase?
• what does your head say about each phrase?
• hold each phrase in your hand (metaphorically), which one feels heavier?
2. Write about the above exercise and your “learning”.
3. Explore the concept of friendship, and consider if you hold yourself to a higher and different standard than you hold your friends ie are you more critical of yourself than you are of your friends?
4. Be gentle with yourself and notice when this is easy or difficult.
5. Celebrate your wonderful heart! You may wish to buy a new journal or buy yourself flowers or design another ritual that helps you say “I love me”!

“May your life be like a wildflower, growing freely in beauty and joy each day.”

- Native American Proverb

Are you a heart centered and soul filled shopper? Through your purchases, you help local artisans, hand-crafting grandmas on a pension, women’s fair trade co-ops and programs designed to support vulnerable mamas & babies. Please share Hippy Grandma widely and wildly with your soul brothers & sisters.
www.hippygrandma.com

Are Your Business Values in Sync With Your Personal Values?

Enjoy the following article I wrote a few years ago as I was generating ideas and energy for hippy grandma! One of our business values and a strongly held personal value is ‘unconditional love’, hence our tag line ‘hippy love for generations’!

namaste,

Zoey

“Values” are the essence of who we are. Values are principles that you hold to be of worth in your life. Values are those things considered right, worthwhile, and desirable- the basis of guiding principles and standards. “Crystal values” are those values that are so important that if not present in your life will cause your life to shatter. Think of what would happen if you dropped a crystal ball. “Rubber values” are those values that you can drop for awhile with no problem and will come bouncing back when necessary. Think of what happens when you drop a rubber ball.

Getting really clear on the values that are most important to you personally and in your business will give you a framework for making decisions, taking forward movement and assessing dissonance in your life. Let me tell you about a client of mine. Carol had identified that she held “social responsibility” and “respect for nature” as very strong values. She found out that the company she was working for was pumping toxic waste into the local watershed. She decided that she could no longer work for that company and in fact, felt she needed to report the company for the poor environmental business practices. In spite of the fact that being unemployed was not attractive, Carol stayed true to her values and resigned. While she had to deal with some short- term financial issues, this decision was worth it to her as she gained so much in the areas of self-honoring and self respect.

Is your business in sync with your personal values? If it is, you likely feel great about the work that you do and love your business. If you started your business without consideration of your personal values, and your personal and business values are out of sync, you may feel unfulfilled, dissatisfied and unhappy in your work.

In our current business environment, it is vitally important that you, the business owner knows what your personal values are, what your business values are and has a marketing program consistent with those values in every way.

Clarity, transparency and communication with your clients around personal and business values leads to a happy and fulfilling life and business and a powerfully positive business reputation!

Do you know what your business values are? What about your personal values? What about your crystal values and your rubber values? Are you in sync with your values? Working with a life & business coach to support you to gain clarity on your values may be beneficial to both you and your business.

peace, namaste & hippy love for generations,

Zoey – founding hippy & ceo (chief enthusiasm officer) at hippy grandma & life & biz coach for women

Are you a heart centered and soul filled shopper? Through your purchases, you help local artisans, hand-crafting grandmas on a pension, women’s fair trade co-ops and programs designed to support vulnerable mamas & babies. Please share Hippy Grandma widely and wildly with your soul brothers & sisters.
www.hippygrandma.com

February is all about “the heart”! We have Valentines Day and Heart month with the Heart & Stroke Foundation, not to mention our ‘far out & fab fan contest’ for February!

As some of you know, I had a heart “attack” in September. My heart attack occurred after receiving a serious health diagnosis for my husband and after meditating on opening the heart and “walking right into the sharp point of the pain”. There could be numerous discussions about the timing of all of this, however, today, I want to tell you more about the type of heart attack I had, as many women I talk to have never heard about this kind.

A “heart attack” or myocardial infarction (MI) by definition, occurs when the blood supply to a part of the heart muscle is cut off because of an “occlusion or obstruction”. Most of us know about coronary artery disease and about “fatty plaques” that can block or occlude blood vessels in the heart and lead to a heart attack. This is the only type of a heart attack I knew about, even after being in “health care” for over 20 years in a “previous life”.

The type of heart attack I had; occurs predominantly in women, is likely under-reported, is not very common (thankfully) and seems to be associated with hormone levels. I want to tell you about it so you will have personal awareness and be attentive to your body, even if you are healthy and do not have heart disease! I had what is called a “spontaneous coronary artery dissection” (SCAD) and what happens is that a few layers of the artery wall pull away or self dissect, creating a “flap” which then pulls away from the artery wall and stops the blood flow. Upon investigation, my arteries were completely clear of “plaques” and I do not have “heart disease” in the way most people think of it. The symptoms of both types of heart attack are the same though.

Here are the symptoms I experienced; for about 2 days prior, I felt a tightness in my chest, which felt like I was developing bronchitis; I felt abit light headed, during the “heart attack”, I felt like a 50- 200 lb dog was sitting on my chest and I had difficulty breathing, this sensation would ease for a while and then it would resume. I had the “heavy dog sitting on my chest” sensation, three times or so and it lasted about 20 minutes each time. I had very little pain! My reference for physical pain is childbirth and relatively speaking, I had virtually no pain, just a slight discomfort in the right (not left) side of my neck, shoulder and arm. I felt pretty calm and relaxed until I googled “symptoms of a heart attack for women” and found I had about 8 out of 10. At this point, I decided I should go to the hospital, still thinking I was being very silly and melodramatic. Very sensibly, I did not drive myself to emerg, I had my daughter drive me. When I arrived in emerg and told them I was having chest tightness & heaviness and difficulty breathing, I was whisked right in. My blood pressure was “sky high”.

My story has a very happy ending; I am healthy, happy and alive. I did not need a stent or bypass. I received incredible medical care and attention. In my recuperation, I was exhausted for about a month and then my energy started to return, although I could resume my walking program almost right away (with my Dr’s OK). I had “critical illness” insurance, so could relax and not worry about finances. I have since talked to another woman who had a very similar experience and apparently there is a North American research study going on about SCAD, let me know if you want more info.

Here is my big “surprise”; I really didn’t experience significant pain, it was more discomfort, heaviness and chest tightness!

Here is my learning: trust my body’s wisdom, listen to the messages of my heart, do not minimize intuitive concerns, know what a “healthy body” and organs feel like, understand the mind/body connection (I was feeling pretty stressed about my husband), know the symptoms of a heart attack, understand that a heart attack doesn’t always contain a lot of “pain” as I was used to thinking of pain, ask for help and don’t drive if I think I am having another heart attack! This experience also re-validated the importance of self-care, a healthy lifestyle, loving relationships and the importance of living each moment fully present and in the now.

Please share this information with your women friends!

peace, namaste & hippy love for generations,

Zoey – founding hippy & ceo at hippy grandma

Are you a heart centered and soul filled shopper? Through your purchases, you help local artisans, hand-crafting grandmas on a pension, women’s fair trade co-ops and programs designed to support vulnerable mamas & babies. Please share Hippy Grandma widely and wildly with your soul brothers & sisters.
www.hippygrandma.com

These are the jackets and this is the entrepreneur, who inspired me to create “Hippy Grandma”! For me, the 60’s are represented by my peach chenille bedspread and what a green & groovy way to pass on a legacy by gifting a hippy baby with a chenille jacket?

Joyce says…

“I began my business in 1978 in order to be able to stay at home and raise my daughter. I began making baby and children’s hair accessories and continued along that path for 25 years. This led to sewing Heirloom Baby Bonnets which also opened the door to Kozy Koats. I have always enjoyed creating beautiful treasures for babies and children. I enjoy searching for unique fabrics and especially searching for vintage material to give them new purpose. I love babies, can you tell”?

Joyce is an amazing seamstress. She creates her baby clothes from a home based studio and imbues her products with spirit grandma love.

peace, namaste & hippy love for generations,

Zoey – founding hippy & ceo at hippy grandma

Are you a heart centered and soul filled shopper? Through your purchases, you help local artisans, hand-crafting grandmas on a pension, women’s fair trade co-ops and programs designed to support vulnerable mamas & babies. Please share Hippy Grandma widely and wildly with your soul brothers & sisters.
www.hippygrandma.com

Hosted by a variety of agencies, this conference is an excellent opportunity to network, learn, share and connect and we wanted to let you know about it!

From the conference brochure…

“Children the Heart of the Matter Conference”

Join us for our 13th Annual Early Learning Conference on February 5-6, 2010.
More info? Click here

peace & namaste,

Zoey – founding hippy & ceo at hippy grandma

Are you a heart centered and soul filled shopper? Through your purchases, you help local artisans, hand-crafting grandmas on a pension, women’s fair trade co-ops and programs designed to support vulnerable mamas & babies. Please share Hippy Grandma widely and wildly with your soul brothers & sisters.
www.hippygrandma.com